Here is the home of LOLcats, for the three of you not familiar.

Color later!

For a few months now, I’m been slowly, tenderly loving Patti Labelle, just waiting for an occasion to spread this love with the rest of the world. Specifically, it’s the Patti & Labelle years that I love, the serious, sexy funk years, a requisite for every person’s life for a number of reasons. Observe my favorite example, which I will explain why you too should love in a moment:

First of all, this is inches away from a drag performance, and I think we all know what I mean by “inches.” I can count on one hand the performers today who go this close to over-the-toppness of this scale. Any drag queen worth her heels should strive to this level of ridiculousness.

Second, the lyrics. Yes, she is actually saying what she appears to be: “I come like the pouring rain each time you call my name. It’s good what you’re doing–what you’re doing.” Is she having a very enthusiastic conversation with her lover? Is she being eaten like a Thankgiving turkey, interpreted through song? I’ll leave that for you to decide.

Finally, the costumes: Not only does her space-suit parka and crotch-high tin-foil boots combination give the impression that she could beam aboard the mother ship any moment and set off on her long-standing mission to defeat Flash Gordon and the defenders of the Earth–not only that, but the outfits Patti and her backup singers are wearing put pieces like this into context in a way that makes them seem perfectly understandable:

Of course Beyonce is wearing a washboard cocktail dress with shoulder pads. It’s all about context. It could make less sense.

And just for good measure, one more little treasure from Ms Labelle:

The faint gets me every time.

I wonder if my friends have caught on to the fact that ANY sort of interaction with me, including random, possibly drunk text messages, becomes the seed of comics like this.

I’ve yet to have one of these delicacies that Clark is so fond of, but I’m certainly intrigued. I mean, I may never have to chew another meal again, at this rate.

I really am a huge fan of this video. I won’t bother posting it here since you’ve probably already seen it (I mean, yer gay, right?), and if not, it’s not hard to find. To me, it’s the perfect example of Beyoncé being able to pull off bat-shit crazy stunts and no body even batting an eye. The gauntlet? Um, duh…why would she NOT wear a cyborg-like metal gauntlet on only one hand? What are you, dumb? Besides, I’m sure it has its practical uses, like opening pickle jars without breaking a nail, calling people on her video phone, or dealing with directing issues quickly and cleanly. 

And thanks to everyone who wished CHB a happy birthday! I obviously showed my gratitude by not doing a comic for a week. Tough love.

It’s amazing how good you get at measuring things on the fly when you use comparative techniques. Really, I imagine John will be much better at the metric system when he gets back from across the pond. This is, of course, if you’re going by actual measurements and not stated ones.

Speaking of measurements: Today, this November the 20th (barely), Capitol Hillbillies turns one year old. I know this only thanks to Livejournal’s little birthday tracker, and since this site started as an LJ community, that’s what I’m counting. The Hillbillies and I seriously want to thank you kids for hanging around for our little party; from the few who became LJ community members early, the random guys from around the world, or the handful of girls (”Hags” if that’s what you prefer…I don’t) who find gay sex just as funny as we do. Jesse, you too…thanks for joining in!

William, Clark and I will be going out this Sunday…no doubt we’ll end up at the Cuff like we usually do on Sundays. Anyone who wants to celebrate this itty bitty anniversary with us is more than welcome.